Dr. Julie de Azevedo on Faith, Therapy, and Finding Your Own Path

What happens when your personal growth conflicts with the expectations of your religious community? And how do women begin to rediscover themselves after years of putting everyone else first?

In a recent interview on Alyssa Grenfell’s channel, Dr. Julie de Azevedo explores these questions through her decades of experience as a therapist, author, and relationship expert. The conversation touches on therapy ethics, women’s identity, religious expectations, and the shame that can come with wanting something different.

What Is Aspirational Shame?

Julie discusses a concept she calls aspirational shame: the guilt women can feel simply for wanting something beyond the roles they’re expected to fill.

Maybe you want to go back to school, pursue a career, or spend more time developing a personal interest. Even if you haven’t acted on that desire, you might feel selfish for wanting it.

For many women, especially those raised with strong expectations around family and motherhood, these feelings can be difficult to untangle. But loving your family and wanting to grow as an individual aren't mutually exclusive.

Therapy, Faith, and Personal Autonomy

Julie also explains how therapy can help people explore their beliefs and relationships without being told what decisions to make.

A therapist’s role isn't to convince someone to stay in a religion, leave a marriage, or follow a particular path. It's to help clients understand themselves, explore their options, and make decisions that align with their own needs and values.

That distinction can be especially important when someone's personal beliefs begin to change or conflict with the expectations of their community.

Rediscovering Yourself Beyond Your Roles

The conversation also explores how religious expectations and purity culture can shape women's relationships with their bodies, sexuality, and sense of self.

After years of prioritizing other people, some women reach a point when they begin asking questions they haven't had much room to consider: Who am I outside of my roles? What do I actually want? And is it okay to choose something different?

Julie’s perspective offers a reminder that personal growth doesn't have to mean rejecting everything that came before. It can mean making space to understand yourself more fully.

Watch the Full Interview

Julie’s conversation with Alyssa Grenfell offers a deeper look at the intersection of therapy, faith, shame, and women's identity.

Watch Dr. Julie de Azevedo’s full interview on Alyssa Grenfell’s channel.